A well-balanced person is one who finds both sides of an issue laughable.

A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.

There is a time when we must firmly choose the course we will follow, or the relentless drift of events will make the decision for us.

Inexperience is what makes a young man do what an older man says is impossible.

If you would like to leave footprints in the sands of time, you had better wear work shoes.

A diet is a plan, generally hopeless, for reducing your weight, which tests your will power but does little for your waistline.

When money talks, there are few interruptions.

There is nothing that makes a man more self-satisfied than a poor memory.

You may be sorry that you spoke, sorry you stayed or went, sorry you won or lost, sorry so much was spent. But as you go through life, you'll find - you're never sorry you were kind.

Some are bent with toil, and some get crooked trying to avoid it.

A little tomato who knows her onions can go out with an old potato and come home with a lot of lettuce and a couple of carats.

I often asked Laplace what he thought of God. He owned that he was an atheist.

I always believe things are going to work out.

I love the fact we're still on the road. I was born to be a factory worker really, so for me the chance to get on stage at Wembley 30 years after we started is amazing.

Mitt Romney is running for president again. That will be attempt No. 3. Well, everybody needs a hobby. He's almost certainly running, and I'm almost certainly retiring, so I don't care.

My only scheme was to be a rapper.

Never meddle with play-actors, for they're a favoured race.

I'm never gonna try it, because you got to pay a lot for cocaine, and that's not the way I want to spend my money.

By gold all good faith has been banished; by gold our rights are abused; the law itself is influenced by gold, and soon there will be an end of every modest restraint.

The phenomenon of HIV criminalization is so much more massive than people understand.

He is truly great who hath a great charity.