A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock.

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings

I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.

My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.

My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.

I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they diffused it.

They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the adults.

I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.

I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be clouds, 14 people showed up, it was overcast.

I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don't worry it's not the end of the world.

It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes

The exhausted mind is obsession's easiest prey.

We don't see a lot of models for male social interaction. There's sports and barn raisings.

Ask who wants to live to be a hundred, and the answer is the person who is ninety-nine.

Whatever is on your plate got there because you said yes to it.

As long as we are not living in harmony with nature and our constitution, we cannot expect ourselves to be really healed. Ayurveda gives us the means

There's nothing worse than shooting a scene you haven't rehearsed.

I try not to handle the foreign subjects with my English techniques and preconceptions, but to paint Sydney in Sydney and Tangier in Tangier.

E is for the EDUCATORS, the women who taught us well.

Like when you go to a magic show and you know how they do the illusions. That's how I am when I watch any movies where they have people flying through the air.

If our feelings control our actions, it is because we have abdicated our responsibility and empowered them to do so.