A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

For others, in spite of myself, from myself.

If this is the freedom you speak of... I want no part of it.

Respect the hand stronger than your hand if and only if that hand is just and an honourable hand!

There is one glory of the sun and another glory of the moon and another glory of the stars: for one star differeth from another star in glory.

Our hope of immortality does not come from any religion but nearly all religions come from that hope.

One out of every 100 families in Vermont was a part owner of Ben and Jerry's.

I don't see anyone avoiding the Stones because DJs make jokes about them being a part of the Geritol set. All it does is make the DJs look stupid.

When those nerf footballs get wet though then they actually do get heavy.

There, I'm an artist. Thousands of women on ecstasy now want to have three-ways with me.