A wise man neither suffers himself to be governed, nor attempts to govern others.

The sweetest of all sounds is that of the voice of the woman we love.

No road is to long for him who advances slowly and does not hurry and no attainment is beyond his reach who equips himself with patience to achieve it

Generosity lies less in giving much than in giving at the right moment.

The spendthrift robs his heirs the miser robs himself.

A vain man finds it wise to speak good or ill of himself; a modest man does not talk of himself.

Courtly manners are contagious; they are caught at Versailles.

We are more sociable, and get on better with people by the heart than the intellect.

A prince wants only the pleasure of private life to complete his happiness.

There is as much trickery required to grow rich by a stupid book as there is folly in buying it.

Out of difficulties grow miracles.

Every fall happens in a slow fade.

Keep your family and old friends around you. That's what I had done and that's what saved my life when it came to being famous.

It will not bother me in the hour of death to reflect that I have been "had for a sucker" by any number of imposters but it would be a torment to know that one had refused even one person in need.

Eva [Braun] loved [Adolf] Hitler and he was the only man in her life. She flirted and danced with other men but never would she have done more than that.

Music does not live until it's interpreted - with all of its flaws, mannerisms, etc. It needs to be incarnated to be something.

The poverty of our century is unlike that of any other. It is not, as poverty was before, the result of natural scarcity, but of a set of priorities imposed upon the rest of the world by the rich.

Homosexuality is the sexual plague of a monogamous society gone promiscuous. These societies that sow the winds of heterosexual freedom ironically reap the whirlwind of homosexual perversion.

The bigger the show, the better I'd play. It was what I was waiting for, and I'd never get nervous.

I got a business card because I wanna win some lunches. That's what my business card says: Mitch Hedberg, Potential Lunch Winner. Gimme a call, maybe we'll have lunch. If I'm lucky!

Desperation, weakness, vulnerability - these things will always be exploited. You need to protect the weak, ring-fence them, with something far stronger than empathy.