A woman told me her child was autistic, and I thought she said artistic. So I said, 'Oh great. I'd like to see some of the things he's done.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

If you can get others to believe that your random guesses are actual answers, they’ll never guess that you never understood the question in the first place.

There's no such thing as a mistake, really. It's just an opportunity to do something else.

Emphasis on the common emotive or affective origins of music and words in the first cries of humankind undermines words.

I believe that if man and woman cherish the same ideals and think alike, then the marriage can be complementary to each other's work instead of being a hindrance.

Only to those who have been in prison does freedom have such great meaning.

Quotations are feeble; you always regret making them.

I train so hard to make sure failure doesn't happen. If I do everything I can, and run as fast as I possibly can and someone still beats me, I don't think of that as failure.

Terrorist activity is continually recurring in various parts of the world, sowing death and destruction and plunging many of our brothers and sisters into grief and despair

As a matter of fact, there is no trace of ill-health in Me. I am always healthy. Not only today, till 96 years I will be like this.

Sloth is sluggishness of the mind which neglects to begin good...it is evil in its effect, if it so oppresses man as to draw him away entirely from good deeds.