Abbott and Costello were huge for me as a very young person.

My dad is a very quick-witted, sarcastic, dry, humorous guy, whereas my mom's very silly, and that side of the family is very musical.

Most of my ideas just come out funny.

There is nothing funny about a well-adjusted, intelligent person making the right choices.

I'm a little bit of an amateur political junkie.

It's never fun to read death threats.

I sort of fell out of new music. I'm old, I like what I like, and that's that.

Nobody hates hipsters more than hipsters.

There's a lot of dopes in life, and in film school. The interesting people are usually easy to find.

Funny people don't really laugh very much.

Dads are awkward because they're older guys who aren't cool anymore and are figuring out who they are, and they often make bad choices in fashion and music.

What more you expect from a nation that honors a barbarian.

The Gospel of God is the Good News.

What people regard as vanity—leaving great works, having children, acting in such a way as to prevent one's name from being forgotten—I regard as the highest expression of human dignity.

For that which all men then did virtue call, Is now called vice; and that which vice was hight, Is now hight virtue, and so used of all: Right now is wrong, and wrong that was is right

April 27. Incapable of living with people, of speaking. Complete immersion in myself, thinking of myself. Apathetic, witless, fearful. I have nothing to say to anyone - never.

The essential quality of an animal is that it seeks its own living, whereas a vegetable has its living brought to it

You speak bad of me, I score goals.

The flower has opened, has been in the sun and is unafraid. I'm taking more chances; I'm bold and proud.

When asked Who I Am, the only answer possible is: I am the infinite, the vastness that is the substance of all things. I am no one and everyone, nothing and everything -- just as you are.

Some teams can't or don't pass the ball. What are you playing for? What's the point? That's not football. Combine, pass, play. That's football - for me, at least.