Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Life moves forward, not backward, and it would be wise to listen to what change has to say.

How many members of Congress go face the people in a town meeting and are prepared to answer questions from the floor. That to me is the real litmus test.

God became man so that man might become a god.

Part of me says that no life will work if I can't make this one right.

Everyone, regardless of ability or disability, has strengths and weaknesses. Know what yours are. Build on your strengths and find a way around your weaknesses.

Literature is an investment of genius which pays dividends to all subsequent times.

One could say that Osama bin Laden and these non-nation-state fighters with religious purpose are very similar to those kind of atypical revolutionaries that helped to cast off the British crown

My only aversion to vice, is the price.

Movie acting may not have a certain kind of glory as true art, but it is damn hard work.

My thought, whose murder yet is but fantastical, Shakes so my single state of man That function is smothered in surmise, And nothing is but what is not.