Accept the fact that girls squeal when they're happy or confused or excited or scared or because they just saw a certain boy in line.

Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?

Whatever your personal political feelings are, if you become involved in them publicly you're bound to come out the loser.

Remain true to yourself and your philosophy. Changing in the face of adversity will in fact diminish your credibility with your customers.

Bonkers is kind of a combination of Jerry Lewis and Harpo Marx, which is very strange because Harpo never spoke!

The fork is the most powerful tool ever placed in our hands.

The barometer that shows "variable" is an ironic indictment of God.

If you want to show a picture, just show it - don't spend too much time arranging it.

On becoming soldiers we have not ceased to be citizens.

Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going.

I have been known to hang out and party back in the day. I had a weekend that lasted a few years.