Admiration: Our polite recognition of another man's resemblance to ourselves.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Inelegantly, and without my consent, time passed.

Everything I touch dies in my hand and the same thing's happening to you. You were vibrant when I met you, and now I've blanched the color from your cheeks and caused you nothing but pain.

Music used to be essential and meaningful, but now it's disposable.

I don't know if I have a book in me, but I'm sure I have more essays.

The world is populated in the main by people who should not exist

You just never know when somebodys gonna die. It could happen at any moment so youve got to really treat everybody that way. Just really let everybody know how you feel about them.

My buddy Tim Bass he's a-workin' pumpin gas, and he makes two fifty for an hour. He's got rhythm in his hands as he's tappin' on the cans, sings rock and roll in the shower.

I had to do something," she said. "I couldn't just sit and wait for life to happen to me any longer.

Exposing characters and their shortcomings gives me great comfort. Its always great to write about someone more mixed up than yourself.

He had seen too much of the cosmos to have any great faith in man's ability to understand it.