After making love I said to my girl, "Was it good for you too?" And she said, "I don't think this was good for anybody."

When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.

Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.

I'm very loyal in a relationship. Any relationship. When I go out with my mom, I don't look at other moms and go, "I wonder what her macaroni and cheese tastes like."

My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.

They should put expiration dates on clothing so we men will know when they go out of style.

Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive.

I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.

I play basketball on Sundays and I'm a very spiritual guy; I read a lot of Eastern philosophy and I meditate.

Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.

I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.

Love brings passionate patience to create a wonderful world of beauty and magnificence.

Faith is the road, but communion with Jesus is the well from which the pilgrim drinks.

As people, we're generally optimistic, no matter how disabled our lives are, and we find the humor in the darkest situations.

Lenders, including major credit companies as well as payday lenders, have taken over the traditional role of the street-corner loan shark, charging the poor insanely high rates of interest.

The fiction I tend to like is nothing like my own work. I like the kind of writing that shows me things I don't know about, and what I don't know about is the everyday, normal world.

I have been criticized rather strenuously by painters and sculptors for not incorporating their work in our buildings.

For me, the music is immaterial: It is sounds and visions.

It doesn't always happen according to the way you have planned things out but I feel if you have covered most of the aspects, it does help out there in the middle.

The Puritans came to America to worship in their way and to force everybody else to do the same thing.

And so they are ever returning to us, the dead.