All I can say about life is, 'Oh God, enjoy it!'

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always out there.

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don't rush into adulthood, it isn't all that much fun.

I love portraying the totally indifferent person.

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much.

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.

People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail.

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell phone. It still brings me up short to walk by somebody who appears to be talking to themselves.

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It would require passing a test, which I would not have been able to do.

I still feel thirty, except when I try to run.

You haven't really been anywhere until you've got back home.

I can see how you could get dragged into the bad stuff, but I've got good friends around me, good family. I think I've got my head screwed on.

It's absurd we remain the only major country on earth not to guarantee health care to all people and paid family and medical leave.

God has a timetable when seemingly miraculous happens.

Being born in a duck yard does not matter, if only you are hatched from a swan's egg.

Future generations, riding on the highways that we built, I hope they have a better understanding.

There is nothing like a person with confidence, male or female, not conceitedness, but confidence. That inspires other people.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

Some people really like to get into Twitter, but it's not my thing.