All real programs contain errors until proved otherwise which is impossible.

The human hand is made complete by the addition of a baseball.

May you look back on the past with as much pleasure as you look forward to the future.

The odds are six to five that the light in the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train.

Airplane Law, The: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.

Allen's Law of Civilization: It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it.

Abrams's Advice: When eating an elephant, take one bite at a time.

A businessman needs three umbrellas - one to leave at the office, one to leave at home, and one to leave on the train.

No experiment is ever a complete failure. It can always be used as a bad example.

Abbott's Admonitions: (1) If you have to ask, you're not entitled to know. (2) If you don't like the answer, you shouldn't have asked the question.

A system tends to grow in complexity instead of simplicity, until the resulting unreliability becomes intolerable.

The shock of recognition is a moment of excitement that shakes the soul. It may be hard to describe, but like other forms of love, you will know it when you feel it

Wow, " Thalia muttered. "Apollo is hot." "He's the sun god, " I said."That's not what I meant.

You can only push the truth down for so long, and then it bubbles back up.

...if you are overdressed, it is a comment on them. If you are under dressed, it is a comment on you.

I have always loved music.

A real man is one who remembers the lady's birthday, but never knows how old she is. A man who never remembers her birthday, but knows exactly how old she is, - is her husband.

No one hangs up the phone until the customer buys or dies.

When the characters are really alive before their author, the latter does nothing but follow them in their action, in their words, in the situations which they suggest to him.

He'd come back, all open and helpless, and I suppose that's what won her around in the end. But it was so sad, because it was being himself that he found so difficult to cope with.

I don't really know that anybody's proven that a random collection of people doing their own thing actually creates value.