All the old fellows stole our best ideas.

Of all the achievements of the human mind, the birth of the alphabet is the most momentous.

Someday I'll design a typeface without a K in it, and then let's see the bastards misspell my name.

Anyone that would letterspace blackletter would steal sheep.

Men who would letterspace lower case would shag sheep.

Love: the sickest of Irony’s sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die.

This lack of accurate, trustworthy information about the true cost of any given policy, product, service, or behavior is paralyzing all action.

Back in the mid-1970s, we adopted some fairly ambitious goals to improve efficiency of our cars. What did we get? We got a tremendous boost in efficiency.

Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later.

People with a meagre soul always try to make others feel small too.

I eat ice cream. It's better than booze.

I am by far your superior, but my notorious modesty prevents me from saying so.

I'm terribly fastidious. I like symmetry and neatness, but my house is as chaotic as any other family's.

Used to have a crush on Dawn from En Vogue. It's not like honey dip would wanna get with me, But just in case I own more condoms than TLC.

My devil had been long caged, he came out roaring