Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

People are so busy making money that they forget they will leave it all behind. When we depart, we only take with us the good we do in this world.

Begin to pursue your dream.

I must govern the clock not be governed by it.

My decorating and renovation skills are nil - indeed, I once used a shower curtain from Pottery Barn as 'window dressing.

Great pleasures are much less frequent than great pains.

I certainly don't take life lightly. To respect the product that you're using, I think, is very important. I think it does connect you a little bit more.

Everyone knows they re going to die,' he said again, 'but nobody believes it. If we did, we would do things differently.

To me, the movie is more funny if, at the same time, you can think a little bit or dream a little bit.

All the beauty of the world, 'tis but skin deep.

You learn a whole lot more about a person if they have bad breaks and all those kind of things.