America's racist, so what do you expect.

I've been to the Leaning Tower of Pisa. It's a tower, and it's leaning. You look at it, but nothing happens, so then you look for someplace to get a sandwich.

We don't even know if we're in this room. We could be in a turtle's dream in outer space.

The choices we make, dictate the lives we lead.

The whole point of love is to put someone else’s needs above your own.

A tree falls the way it leans. Be careful the way you lean.

Christmas is a good excuse to eat everything.

We did 'Erin Brockovich,' we did 'Man on the Moon,' we did 'Living Out Loud,' but now I'm going to keep going.

It's fun to be on the edge. I think you do your best work when you take chances, when you're not safe, when you're not in the middle of the road, at least for me, anyway.

I don’t look ahead. I’m right here with you. It’s a good way to be.

There are two dilemmas that rattle the human skull: How do you hang on to someone who won't stay? And how do you get rid of someone who won't go?

I just don't see the point of not eating cheese. I mean, if God didn't want us to eat cheese, would he have let man invent it?

The hack is like a politician who consults the polls before he takes a position. He's a demagogue. He panders.

Swallows and Amazons for-ever!

What is man? ... What a strange union of matter and mind! A machine for converting material into spiritual force.

You have to be very careful with who you do business. It's like a marriage. Do your research and check references.

I am black or white, I'll never be grey in my life.

I've never suffered stage fright. That fascinates people.

Happiness is just a great equalizer. It's like water. You pour happiness liberally and all sorts of great things are going to happen.

I ate too many Frosted Flakes. I don't remember what I said last night.

He bought me so many orchids that I looked like a well-kept grave.