American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

You have to choose whether to go to a restless sleep or to stay awake and fight for a blissful night rest.

College was to teach me that I was one of life's journeymen, eager to excel but lacking the requisite gifts.

And so I was left with a mantra, a sort of haiku version of our relationship: I don’t regret one day I spent with him, nor did I leave a moment too soon.

Sweetest li'l feller everybody knows Dunno what to call him but he's mighty lak' a rose Lookin' at his mammy wid eyes so shiny blue Mek' you think that Heav'n is comin' clost ter you.

They say that love is always blind and that explains so much, young lovers always seem so prone to use their sense of touch.

Man's most sacred privilege is freedom of will, the ability to obey or disobey his Maker.

I discover vision, not as a 'thinking about seeing,' to use Descartes expression, but as a gaze at grips with a visible world, and that is why for me there can be another's gaze.

I may be ignorant but I ain't stupid!

I tried to make sense of the Four Books, until love arrived, and it all became a single syllable.