Americans are a quarter of a billion people who have almost nothing in common except for the fact they've been told they have lots in common.

Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.

Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without.

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.

Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.

Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code?

When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.

Knowledge is the first step of enlightenment

I don't have a religion, you know. This is what I am. I am a Rastaman; so this is not religion. This is life.

Wild Bill was a strange character. In person he was about six feet and one inch in height. He was a Plains-man in every sense of the word.

Continuity of life means continual readaptation of the environment to the needs of living organisms.

I am unlimited in my own ability to create the good in my life.

The great comfort of turning forty-nine is the realization that you are now too old to die young.

If you can't play all the instruments in the orchestra of story, no matter what music may be in your imagination, you're condemned to hum the same old tune.

Whatever the Democrats want, yeah, they should get it. We're for it!

Here is an opportunity for you to celebrate like never before, my own power, and my own ability to get myself to do whatever is necessary.

If you would ask my mom what books I liked growing up, I liked Dr. Seuss.