An old wine-bibber having been smashed in a railway collision, some wine was poured on his lips to revive him.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

If anyone was going to get themselves murdered to guarantee they would remain the center of attention, it would be him.

If I Could Read The Last Page of My Life....

Man is a little bit better than his reputation, and a little bit worse

Everyone honors the wise.

People make snap judgments about me that are frequently misguided.

Unless you love yourself, it's difficult to respect anyone else who holds that high an opinion of you.

God made the world from nothing, and if we can be nothing, then God can make something of us.

The web is more a social creation than a technical one. I designed it for a social effect - to help people work together - and not as a technical toy.

While ice is not really alive, it is certainly animate. It exists in an dynamic state of perpetual vibration, flux and movement. Enjoy its existence, and its safe passage in the mountains.