And I have one of those very loud, stupid laughs. I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I'd probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.

It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.

I am always saying "Glad to've met you" to somebody I'm not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.

The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one.

You can't stop a teacher when they want to do something. They just do it.

The more expensive a school is, the more crooks it has — I'm not kidding.

Grand. There's a word I really hate. It's a phony. I could puke every time I hear it.

Mothers are all slightly insane.

I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy.

Certain things, they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone.

Anyway, I'm sort of glad they've got the atomic bomb invented. If there's ever another war, I'm going to sit right the hell on top of it. I'll volunteer for it, I swear to God I will.

In Western Civilization, our elders are books.

Responsibility is a grace you give yourself not an obligation

Give your Friends Roses while they are still alive

One cannot have "success" in poetry. If I wanted to be successful, I'd have become a lawyer.

One of the questions I often get asked is, "Were you surprised that Trump won?" I always answer the same way: "I was surprised, I am surprised and I will never stop being surprised."

The best thing about wearing black is that you can hide pretty easily, unless you're in like Hawaii, then you can't hide.

As a person, you want to feel like you're giving back. That's something I've always enjoyed doing.

A little kingdom I possess, where thoughts and feelings dwell; And very hard the task I find of governing it well.

The police can go to downtown Harlem and pick up a kid with a joint in the streets. But they can't go into the elegant apartments and get a stockbroker who's sniffing cocaine.

It's most presumptuous to believe we already know all the answers and will never get any more big surprises.