And finally, in our time a beard is the one thing that a woman cannot do better than a man, or if she can her success is assured only in a circus.

Don't worry about losing. If it is right, it happens - The main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away.

Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

The free exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world.

And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.

What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness.

I believe a strong woman may be stronger than a man, particularly if she happens to have love in her heart. I guess a loving woman is indestructible.

When two people meet, each one is changed by the other so you've got two new people.

Writers are a little below clowns and a little above trained seals.

This I must fight against: any idea, religion, or government which limits or destroys the individual.

If you understand each other you will be kind to each other.

Inadequate love is love. Unrequited love is love.

Say you were standing with one foot in the oven and one foot in an ice bucket. According to the percentage people you would be perfectly comfortable.

But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an actor or even wanted to write sketch comedy. I got into stand-up because I love stand-up.

A large portion of the Earth's land area is taken up by old varsity jackets.

With a film, things constantly have to go up in the story, and you're constantly putting pressure on the main character. It allows to go really deep into what its relationship is.

It's not social issues I care about.

I love doing different things where, for a little while, I can focus on standup then sketch writing, then performing, then directing a video. That, to me, is stimulating.

I will die, but not retire.

Now as jazz musicians we're saying for this society, you can free up your imagination. You can proceed in an area without much information and you can function in an area without much information.

Confidence is the illusion born of accidental success.