And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

It's not what you learn, it's the way you learn it.

I collected speech from so called "Smart", "Genius" nation... the judge is going to be made from you... ...Don't worry "Notes of A Dead Man Sequel" are going to be one damn long journey.

Realize your purpose and carry it out boldly

Truth is certainly a branch of morality and a very important one to society.

Oscar Peterson is my favorite all-around pianist. There are pianists I like because of one thing and pianists I like because of another. But overall, I like Oscar Peterson best.

I have always done my own stunts, and I have been in hundreds of fights in films, but I have never been in a fist fight outside the movies.

Is Zionism racism? I would say yes. It's a policy that to me looks like it has very many parallels with racism. The effect is the same. Whether you call it that or not is in a sense irrelevant.

The preacher asked her and she said I do. The preacher asked me, and she said yes he does, too.

My neglected duties crowd around me in my dreams, murmuring.

I feel like I'm a designer, not a pop star. But if certain people think of me like a pop star, then the only thing I could do about this is dye my hair black and cut it short maybe.