And the propensity of weak and empty people to follow a leader into the darkness from which there is no return is still flourishing, as ever.

If there is a secret to writing, I haven’t found it yet. All I know is you need to sit down, clear your mind, and hang in there.

Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become.

You need the will to disarm the civilian population. If we can do it in Somalia, we can do it here.

My friend Phil has a theory that the Lord, having made teenagers, felt constrained to make amends and so created the golden retriever.

We have a new class in this country: the deserving rich. ... The deserving rich do nice things for each other. Comforting the unafflicted is something that comes naturally to them.

I am hoping for better times. That's how you know us hapless gardeners - by our dirty fingernails and our absurd, unquenchable optimism about next year.

Baseball has a special place in our hearts. It is the game that shows us as we would like to be.

Appliances have idiosyncracies, just like us. Unfortunately they have picked up our less attractive traits - they are proud, spiteful, and unforgiving.

[On men:] On their best days, the best of them are eight years old.

Human sacrifice is much in vogue right now. The Republican right thinks that people who get on its nerves, especially women, should be sent to the stake. . .

I don't know whether I believe in God or not. I think, really, I'm some kind of a Buddhist. But the essential thing is to put oneself in a frame of mind which is close to that of prayer.

All my life I wanted to be accepted.

His Kiss:He has me at his every whim

Divorced from ethics, leadership is reduced to management and politics to mere technique.

I always try to write a song to work things out with myself and I want to do it with a little punchline at the end, because I never want to remember anything bad in my life.

It's true we pure mathematicians are connected to a different world. But it is a very real world nevertheless.

Some forms of reality are so horrible we refuse to face them, unless we are trapped into it by comedy. To label any subject unsuitable for comedy is to admit defeat.

The local music community here was dying for a place to record, so we started doing acoustic, folk and bluegrass and then did rock projects for other bands, as well as for my son Tal and my own work.

A generation ago, the image was that you had to trample everyone else down to succeed; but I don't believe that makes good business sense.

I couldn't believe Sam actually got me a present because i honestly thought the "I love you" was it.