And this title, retired Major Ryland, gives you authority over my MasterCard?

We are victims of our history and our present. They place too many obstacles in the way of love. And we cannot enjoy even our differences in peace.

The world is already yours - why try to conquer it?

Life is stressful, dear. That's why they say "rest in peace.

It's not that I find it hard to meet girls - they do come up and chat me up from time to time. Sometimes I'm interested, I tend not to go for the prettier ones. I prefer the quirkier types.

Till swollen with cunning, of a self-conceit, His waxen wings did mount above his reach, And, melting, Heavens conspir'd his overthrow.

After high school, I had $2,000 saved, and I packed everything I could into my '95 Nissan Sentra with no air-conditioning, and I drove out to L.A.

Against a dark sky all flowers look like fireworks. There is something strange about them, at once vivid and secret, like flowers traced in fire in the phantasmal garden of a witch.

Never waste a lie; you never know when you may need it.

Listen, I would never judge someone who screwed their babysitter for years or knocked up their secretary, so don't ask me to.

Have no respect whatsoever for authority; forget who said it and instead look what he starts with, where he ends up, and ask yourself, "Is it reasonable?"