Any man will admit if need be that his sight is not good, or that he cannot swim or shoots badly with a rifle, but to touch upon his sense of humour is to give him mortal affront.

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything

Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so.

It may be those who do most, dream most.

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.

A half truth, like half a brick, is always more forcible as an argument than a whole one. It carries better.

Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit

I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.

It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.

Don't you want to know what cookies is a code word for?" "No! Good God, no!

When you work on what you love, you have the best job in the world.

I get so sad that sad gets to be.So scared that all my feelings they up and leave me. I got so city girl on you. I go so crazy I don't know what to do.

Germany is a great nation only because its people have so much Polish blood in their veins.

Whatever you do has to be commercial and it can't be too distracting - it has to be background music, basically.

Children sweeten labours, but they make misfortunes more bitter.

Writing and cafes are strongly linked in my brain.

I'm always being asked to play roles or characters that I don't really resemble.

Artists are perceptive, but they choose to write songs or make movies or paint pictures rather than simply keeping private diaries.

I stand for judgment: answer: shall I have it?