Anyone who has ever taken out a mortgage will be unsurprised to learn that it is, literally, a /death pledge/.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it was the sausage-maker who disposed of the body.

Reality changes words far more than words can ever change reality.

Poetry is much more important than the truth, and, if you don't believe that, try using the two methods to get laid.

So familiar are eggs to us, however, that in the eighteenth century they were referred to as cackling farts, on the basis that chickens cackled all the time and eggs came out of the back of them.

We all know that scientific words need an obscure classical origin to make them sound impressvie to those who wouldn't know an idiopathic craniofacial erythema if it hit them in the face.

It is much harder than you might think to show people your bottom.

A ham sandwich is better than nothing. Nothing is better than eternal happiness. So eternal happiness is beaten by a ham sandwich.

The glamour's off. Almost any question you ask can be answered. It's only the questions that you didn't know to ask that remain, dancing the can-can behind your back. The unknown unknowns.

I had to go outside. I had to let the element of chance in.

On the occasions that he did look up from the page, he would seem as though he were awakening from a dream.

Do you believe in apathy at first sight?

I love to see when ya move with the rhythm; I love to see when you're dancin' from within; It gives great joy to feel such sweet togetherness, everyone doin' and they're doing their best!

It is your holy work, to deeply love, honor and respect the precious self that you are, the soul that only you hold.

I'm too tired to reign over vampirekind, let alone enslave the human race.

A sound banker, alas, is not one who foresees danger and avoids it, but one who, when he is ruined, is ruined in a conventional way along with his fellows, so that no one can really blame him.

Its hard to take in. One of our most talented singer songwriters has left us. RIP George Michael. Such sad, tragic news. 2016 please end.

Obsession is the single most wasteful human activity, because with an obsession you keep coming back and back and back to the same question and never get an answer.

I don't like it when people don't act on their words.

If you're cast right you can actually just let yourself go because all your gestures will be right, all your intonations will be right because you just somewhere understand who this person is.