Armenians and Azerbaijanis in Stepanakert, capital of the Nagorno-Karabakh autonomous region, rioted over much needed spelling reform in the Soviet Union.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

I understand that your brain is large and perpetually at war with itself

Recovering Leah knows fear stands for false expectations appearing real.

Grammar is the logic of speech even as logic is the grammar of reason.

I am always at a loss to know how much to believe of my own stories.

the mind naturally accommodates itself, even to the most ridiculous improprieties, if they occur frequently.

To keep our faces toward chance and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.

Eating and exercising should be conscious decisions.

What has validity is your living, not what happens tomorrow.

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Art isn't and shouldn't be responsible. If it is, it isn't functioning as art.