Art theft gave a guy an appetite.

Ask yourself: 'Do I feel the need to laminate?' Then teaching is for you.

When we lock things away," he said with conviction, "we're really imprisoning ourselves.

The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down.

If it isn't on YouTube, it might as well have never happened.

Ask me. I'm a cow expert.

In our family, you don't get a childhood. We're too busy trying to dominate the world.

The thing about a cavity search is this: it has nothing to do with the dentist.

What did Romeo and Juliet do?” They died,” I remind her gently. “Some mix-up with the poison-

Don't think of it as losing a boyfriend. Think of it as gaining a stalker." -Dan Cahill

I hate France. It's like the whole country's on a diet

Love is the only brick that hits you on the head and gives you a smile instead of tears.

We see that the vast majority of our suffering is needless, and simply arises from the misidentification with our thinking mind.

We are strangers to our own lives, setting out in the dark to look for the adobe of Love which we were meant to know, guided by the Music that wants us to see.

In sum, one of the primary things I learned was how to kill time. I learned also to wish away my life. I learned to give myself away.

Who knows if the gods above will add tomorrow's span to this day's sum?

I am certain no one sets out to be cruel, but our treatment of the elderly ill seems to have no philosophy to it. As a society, we should establish whether we have a policy of life at any cost.

A man who says, 'I was wrong,' really in effect says, 'I am a little wiser today than I was yesterday.

People aren't doing whodunits anymore.

It's funny, I worked with a lot of directors in the many years that I've been doing this, and generally when you hear a director yelling on set, everybody scatters in the other direction.

Half-knowledge is worse than ignorance.