As I get older, I don't think the world is becoming that funny. Comedy is changing a bit.

Texas is the crossroads of the world. Everything here is big.

I'm one of those people that will walk into a bar, and if I wasn't a comic - because some people know who I am - I would just blend in.

I guess I am handsome - in certain parts of the world. If I was, like, in Mongolia, living on a mountain and in my village, I could be the hottest guy. In L.A., I'm ... average?

People think I am crazy because they see me doing stand-up, but I am generally not. I am very sad. I'm one of those guys that lights candles and listens to Rachmaninoff.

It's not that comedy has changed in terms of what's funny. For me, it's changed in that sometimes I don't feel my finger is on the pulse.

With Bitcoin hard-coded to be limited, it’s like a collectible.

I think people just think I am crazy because they see me doing stand-up, but I am generally not. I am very sad. I'm one of those guys that lights candles and listens to Rachmaninoff.

People will not look forward to posterity who never look backward to their ancestors.

No one should let yesterday use up too much of today. Easy to say, hard to live.

There is a law of time, a law of oblivion: glory to the dead; life to the living.

Thirty years ago, the Pandora's box of the Internet wasn't yet a fact of life, and celebrities inhabited a more remote, hard-to-reach plane.

Orange is the happiest color.

Great business turns on a little pin.

The world is changing and the physical barriers are down now. It's time for the emotional barriers to go down. And what better place to start than school?

I've played a lot of bad guys, 'cause that was the only work I could get. People saw my face and went 'oooh'.

If I were to be really petulant, I would say New York is the one doing the betraying. Because the New York I fell in love with doesn't really exist anymore.

Meanwhile, life keeps moving forward. The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?