As a man, I've learned that there is nothing easier in married life than pleasing your wife with your cooking.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

The cruelest thing is love that leads us to deal with the parts of ourselves that we do not want to see, and this is what, in fact, we do not forgive each other.

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.

Success is an absurd, erratic thing. She arrives when one least expects her and after she has come may depart again almost because of a whim.

Chastisement is designed for our good, to promote our highest interests. Look beyond the rod to the All-wise hand that wields it!

All I can think about is bed.” “We’re sharing the same thought.” “You’re thinking about bed too?” “I’m thinking about YOU in MY bed.

I need to learn to be more assertive.

No one can say I didn't pay my dues in life.

Without true medical liability reform, our doctors will continue to leave, and young doctors coming out of medical school $100,000 to $200,000 in debt will not be able to afford such onerous costs.

I'm not saying I want a film career because I think I'm too good for television. I'm simply saying I want more control over my life.