As an American citizen, I'm not asking for any special treatment - the only thing I ask and want is to be treated just like an Illegal Alien.

Has there ever been anybody, real or fictional, whiter than Betty Crocker?

About 25 years ago, I started out as a reporter covering politics. And that sort of just evolved into organized crime, because organized crime and politics were the same thing in Boston.

Which of the following two groups contains the most former grand dragons of the Ku Klux Klan - the first 59 Tea Party people you run into this morning, or the U.S. Senate Democratic caucus?

I think among the retired FBI agents there are some who would not like to see him come back, but I think the people running the FBI now are interested in catching him.

Barack Obama is like the old joke about boats. The two best days of owning a boat are the day you buy it and the day you sell it.

Joe Biden was first elected to the Senate in 1972 at age 30. Somewhere around 1992, he should have had to go out and get a real job.

Anyone who doesn't think the welfare-industrial complex is trying to increase dependency isn't paying attention.

An armed society is a free society.

Michelle Obama - they don't call her Mooch-elle for nothing.

The higher someone's profile, the easier it is for a defendant to trade him up to the feds. Mr. Big is always a better catch than Mr. Small.

Jolly felt salty tears on her lips, and for the first time in her life it occurred to her that sorrow tasted exactly like the sea.

I want to teach. I want to speak. I want to travel.

I am probably a pseudo-intellectual.

It's not curators, it's not critics, it's not the public, it's not collectors who find great artists - it's other artists.

A lot of people who are involved in self-discovery lose energy to abusive teachers, to abusive friends and to entities, non-physical beings.

I'm really getting to appreciate traditional jazz now - the New Orleans stuff - a lot more than I did before.

You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.

Avoidance is a wonderful therapy

I'm aware of the luck in [BABIP], but at the same time, you can't directly influence it. You can just keep mixing your patterns, executing and locating, That's the human element of this game.

A novelist is someone who sits around the house all day in his underwear, trying not to smoke.