As far as exercising goes... watch for my next book, How I died while Jogging.

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.

Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face.

Learn how to set goals. That's the key to everything. That includes designing your own success. You define what the goal is, it's not somebody else's goal, it's yours.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.

I'm a big believer in overcoming and achieving and doing things and not feeling sorry for yourself.

I love the normalcy of Cleveland. There's regular people there.

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with it.

You say tomato, I say bourbon and coke.

Things don't make me nearly as happy as talking and having a beer with my friends. And that's something everyone can do.

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has led to the rise of the gang problems we have now.

You can have it all, just not all at the same time.

I love to engage in repartee with people who are stupider than I am.

Screw the daring tough guy image, what happened with us broke me.

I like to audition for good projects because if it's a good project, it's an opportunity to get in front of a casting director.

Day after day, we culture our minds with the deep silence of our own Being.

With the opening of the second decade of the twentieth century it seemed that the stage was set for the last act in an unquestioned evolutionary drama.

Texas was such a welcoming place, and with its unbelievable history and tradition, it's extra special to be a part of that.

It's just as possible to live to the full in a narrow corner as it is in bigness.

An angel can illumine the thought and mind of man by strengthening the power of vision and by bringing within his reach some truth which the angel himself contemplates.

Yeah, I'm going to learn. I'm going to learn to skate really good, and if I can't, I'm going to get hurt doing it.