As far as my own life goes, I don't buy into the Hollywood scene.

I tell my kids, 'I'm your father, not your friend - but I'm also the best friend you're ever going to have because no one is going to care for you the way I care about you.'

There's no such thing as quality time; there's only quantity time.

I read a lot of true-crime books, but sometimes they can put you in a bad mood.

Being the father of girls is a kind of illness, in its own way - since any guy who has tried to live in a house with a wife and two daughters is, without any doubt, going to go certifiably nuts.

I've been offered 'Celebrity Fit Club', where you have to take off your shirt and get on a scale. I got kids, man. I'm not going to humiliate myself. I'd rather drive a cab.

Sometimes being a dad is like watching a ping-pong match.

Kids don't come with an instruction manual. So if you're gonna make mistakes, at least make them your own way.

David is the show. There are other writers, but it's David's vision.

Moms and daughters can negotiate over anything, and they can go on longer than it took to settle the Vietnam War.

I've worked too hard all my life to have my kids control my life.

See you on the other side of the screen, if you make it, earnest cyberspace cadet.

I assume that a sufficiently skilled will be able to do anything not explicitly forbidden by the hardware.

Try this now. If you can't do it, you can do Headstand instead. If you don't want to do that, go home!

The message of guidance that neither politics nor philosophy nor religion now seems able to provide, we look for in modern literature.

You sometimes have to join forces with those you'd rather avoid.

You can't stumble upon something new and wonderful if you don't have time to stumble.

Some have said there is no subtlety to destruction. You know what? They're dead.

Often my characters have some kind of idealism or grand belief that they're pursuing.

I look upon literature as an art, and I believe that if you misuse it or abuse it, it will leave you. It is not a thing that you can nail down and use as you want. You have to let it use you, too.

Prayer might not change things, but it will change my perspective of things. Prayer might not change the past, but inevitably, it changes the present.