BE CAREFUL, OR BE ROADKILL!

You can present the material, but you can't make me care.

I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin

From now on, I'm not doing anything I don't want to do! The world owes me happiness, fulfillment and success.... I'm just here to cash in.

You know, maybe we don't need enemies.""Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.

Maybe we can eventually make language a complete impediment to understanding.

It's not enough that you move through the world - you must change it to suit your expectations.

Reality is one of the possibilities I cannot afford to ignore

O to be self-balanced for contingencies, to confront night, storms, hunger, ridicule, accidents, rebuffs, as the trees and animals do.

I have always liked clothes - throughout my life, my saving grace has been my own vanity.

With comics, you always talk about a big break, but there are a lot of big breaks in your life and not one of them makes a big difference.

Today's audience knows more about what's on television than what's in life.

Dont fight even over girlfriends. The country is full of beautiful women. If you cant get one, come to Mugabe for assistance.

Take "no" as an encouragement to redouble his efforts, so it was easier to say "yes" right away.

Breakthrough is how to distinguish a leader and who followed

As we all know, the Discworld is a flat planet - like a geological pizza, but without the anchovies.