BEG, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

People love to quote that Jesus is love, yet they neglect to mention that He's also King. If you love the King, you will obey Him.

Every yesterday we lose ourselves so that we can find ourselves in tomorrow.

All changes even the most longed for have their melancholy for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves we must die to one life before we can enter into another.

We need to tap the resource of current and retiring science and math professionals that have both content mastery and the practical experience to serve as effective teachers.

Whatever liberates our spirit, without also giving us mastery over ourselves, is destructive.

If your product is great, you yourself do not have to be a great seller.

The biggest shock of your life is when you first make a record and go to a show and then people start singing the words. Because it occurs to you that they've listened to it!

I find it hard to believe that anyone could be so curious about me that they would want to read that I wear underwear shorts with green polka dots on them.

I just want my children to be happy. I want my children to be healthy.

Sends Nature forth the daughter of the skies... To dance on earth, and charm all human eyes.