Back horses or go down to Throgmorton Street and try to take it away from the Rothschilds, and I will applaud you as a shrewd and cautious financier. But to bet at golf is pure gambling.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

I have noticed that the solar radiation reflections from rippled privacy windows cause greatly accelerated growth patterns in plants

... responsibilities are the anvil on which a man is forged.

I love having to attend the one class that is being taught by a professor who feels that their class is the only class being taught at the University and gives nothing but busy work.

It is a foolish judge who, before the evidence is presented, makes a judgement.

He nothing common did, or mean, / Upon that memorable scene, / But with his keener eye / The axe's edge did try.

Those who never rebelled against God or at some point in their lives shaken their fists in the face of heaven, have never encountered God at all.

I'll have a different answer tomorrow that I do today.

The 55% of American households that make less than $40,000 will get a tax break of only $7 while the households that make more than $1 million will receive an average tax break of $32,000.

I was an extreme tomboy. I did competitive gymnastics for over 10 years. I cut my hair like Winona Ryder, with that little pixie cut.

The sun is a-wait at the ponderous gate of the West.