Baseball has a special place in our hearts. It is the game that shows us as we would like to be.

If there is a secret to writing, I haven’t found it yet. All I know is you need to sit down, clear your mind, and hang in there.

Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become.

And the propensity of weak and empty people to follow a leader into the darkness from which there is no return is still flourishing, as ever.

You need the will to disarm the civilian population. If we can do it in Somalia, we can do it here.

My friend Phil has a theory that the Lord, having made teenagers, felt constrained to make amends and so created the golden retriever.

We have a new class in this country: the deserving rich. ... The deserving rich do nice things for each other. Comforting the unafflicted is something that comes naturally to them.

I am hoping for better times. That's how you know us hapless gardeners - by our dirty fingernails and our absurd, unquenchable optimism about next year.

Appliances have idiosyncracies, just like us. Unfortunately they have picked up our less attractive traits - they are proud, spiteful, and unforgiving.

[On men:] On their best days, the best of them are eight years old.

Human sacrifice is much in vogue right now. The Republican right thinks that people who get on its nerves, especially women, should be sent to the stake. . .

Every piece of art has a buyer. Only Time decides when the right buyer will see it.

Don't be a leader to dictate, but be a person whom everyone wants to emulate and follow.

Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf.Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure.But th' shelf is th' main thing.

What else is there to write about than love and loss?

As I drifted off to sleep, I could hear him breathing, and that definitely helped me relax.

Tears are another river that takes us home. We become alive with tears. There isn't a chance to return to sleep when we are weeping.

Dude, you're such a geek. And that's coming from an overweight Star Trek fan who scored a 5 on the AP Calculus test. So you know your condition is grave

You can have either the Resurrection or you can have Liberace. But you can't have both.

The divine is not something high above us. It is in heaven, it is in earth, it is inside us.

One thing about the past. It's likely to last.