Baseball is more than a game to me, it's a religon.

That guy in a twenty-five cent bleacher seat is as much entitled to know a call as the guy in the boxes. He can see my arm signal even if he can't hear my voice.

Baseball is more than a game to me, it's a religion.

An angry player can't argue with the back of an umpire who is walking away.

Your job is to umpire for the ball and not the player.

The best umpired game is the game in which the fans cannot recall the umpires who worked it.

It ain't nothing till I call it.

The most cowardly thing in the world is blaming mistakes upon the umpires. Too many managers strut around on the field trying to manage the umpires instead of their teams.

I told the umpires to walk back at least thirty-five feet from home plate. That reduced the arguements.

Young man, if that bat comes down, you're out of the game

In my heart, I never called one wrong.

Don't eat bear balls. Eat healthy, delectable, plant-based foods so that you will never fall over on your cat.

It is my passionate belief that we can all have better health care through rationing.

I've been successful in different areas, but nothing brings a smile to my face more than my oldest son, Zaire, and my second son, Zion, saying the kind word of 'Dad.'

My heroines are always virgins. They never go to bed without a ring on their fingers; not until page 118 at least.

Don't take life so seriously. Have fun. Enjoy your time on this planet. Try new things, go on adventures, and appreciate every little thing because it may not be as little as you might think.

When people come in the door and they have something, discovering and exploring the character is a real joy.

To make a million, start with $900,000.

Once, he'd used it in song, but the songs in his heart had gone silent long ago, and he knew that one day so would his voice. A man with nothing inside him eventually had nothing to say.

I don't think they [contemporary writers] read me either. I mean, if we're concerned genuinely with writing, I think we probably get on with our work.

There are two kinds of success-initial and ultimate.