Be able to live alone, even if you don't want to and think you will never find it necessary.

To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.

Success is achieved by developing our strengths, not by eliminating our weaknesses.

Know how and how much to tip people who expect gratuities, even in the case of poor service.

Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.

Working in an office with an array of electronic devices is like trying to get something done at home with half a dozen small children around. The calls for attention are constant.

Be able to hiccup silently, or at least without alerting neighbors to your situation. The first hiccup is an exception.

Be able to analyze statistics, which can be used to support or undercut almost any argument.

Skill is successfully walking a tightrope between the twin towers of New York's World Trade Center. Intelligence is not trying.

Know the official post office abbreviations for all 50 states without having to consult a list.

There's plenty of intelligence in the world, but the courage to do things differently is in short supply.

I'm not a goose, you're the gooses for crying over nothing

Sports, Politics and Technology. All the same game.

Whales are killed today to supply the limited demand for whale meat or to be used in pet foods or as fodder for fur-bearing animals used in the fur trade.

The title always comes last. What I really work hard on is the beginning. Where do you begin? In what tone do you begin? I almost have to have a scene in my mind.

We plainly perceive that the mind strengthens and decays with the body.

The power of mass intention may ultimately be the force that shifts the tide toward repair and renewal of the planet.

Anywhere you go liking everyone, everyone will be likeable.

One of the coolest things was that, in 2007, I got to go to Iraq with Rob Riggle, Paul Scheer, and Horatio Sanz. We went over there to do some comedy shows with the U.S.O.

It's about taking everything you thought was true and throwing it out the window. It's about embracing life's unpredictability, letting go of boundaries, and starting over

What I learned in the military is that gossip starts early and it stays forever.