Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.

There are only two things to remember. Number one...Don't Stop, and number two...Keep Going!

The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else's life.

Power will be maintained by the groovy guy or gal who gets the most media coverage for his sleaze. Naturally, his friends in various businesses will do okay, too.

Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them's really right, cause neither of them care.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out the uglier everything seems.

The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.

I do not know what to do with the emotions inside me. I do not know how to be this close to someone and still hold on to myself.

We all want to become more than we are, we want to live forever, that is why we hate death and create the afterlife.

The past does not define me, it ignites me. The past is not a piece of me, it has placed me

By science calmed, over the peaceful soul, Bright with eternal Wisdom's lucid ray, Peace, meek of eye, extends her soft control, And drives the puny Passions far away.

You can't take life for granted. I am lucky to have everything I've ever wanted. I've got a beautiful wife, a job I've always dreamed of...and my face on my own t-shirts.

The actor in me would always like to be more dashing, or slimmer, or have nicer hair.

All penguins are the same below the surface, which I think is as perfect an analogy as we're likely to get for the futility of racism.

You’re always a kid around your parents… Unless they’re acting like children. Then you don’t get the chance.

One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said, "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read"

If I were really, truly in love with someone who was truly in love with me, then I would get married, but that would be the only reason I'd get married.