Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.

Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.

I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.

Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

We must not waste life in devising means. It is better to plan less and do more.

Patience is passion tamed.

Why has not Man a microscopic eye? For this plain reason, Man is not a Fly. Say what the use, were finer optics giv'n, T' inspect a mite, not comprehend the heav'n.

It came to me that I should teach this truth for it is real happiness and joy. The cessation of suffering is possible.

Love is the terrible secret people are suspected of unless they're married, then one always suspects they don't.

Because of the wonderfully positive response to 'Life's That Way,' I am considering writing some more autobiographical stuff - maybe another book. I don't know. It doesn't help that I'm lazy.

See we not plainly that obedience of creatures unto the law of nature is the stay of the whole world?

Football is something like war. Whoever behaves too properly, is lost.

Great presidents don't just fight good fights - they win them.

I can't go back because I lost all my Soul Reaper powers! - Rukia You lost your powers? What are they, socks? - Ichigo