Best friend isn't a person, it's a tier.

I'm not overweight. I flucuate between chubby and curvy.

I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying, picture-hanging man. I don't care if he takes prescription drugs for cholesterol or hair loss.

There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.

I have a thick skin, which comes from being a not-really-skinny, dark-skinned Indian woman. I haven’t fit in every place, and so I’m kind of used to resistance.

I, like most women, I dress for other women, I think. If I was going to dress for men, I think in general I would be just wearing, like, a fitted black T-shirt and tight jeans every day.

If you are going to ask your crush for their phone number, you are one of the small group of women I am so jealous of.

Running is a quick trigger for a good mood. The great thing about endorphins, you don't have to be in great shape to get them.

Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.

There's the psychotic ambitious side of myself that wants a fashion line and my own network and be like a combination of Oprah and Gwen Stefani. And have a perfume. Definitely a perfume.

Right now, I'm hankering for new adventures... Ninety percent of the time I'm having romantic-comedy fantasies in which I'm wearing little pencil skirts and hurrying down to the subway.

Regrets will eat you alive if you let them. You gotta outrun them. Find something in the now.

Never walk away from failure. On the contrary, study it carefully and imaginatively for its hidden assets.

Intelligence recognizes what has happened. Genius recognizes what will happen.

A good mustache makes a man for many reasons.

The courage to be is the courage to accept oneself, in spite of being unacceptable.

It's interesting, gender versus race. I think people say that to women more: 'Oh, you're my favorite female.' They wouldn't say 'favorite black comic.'

There is nothing very religious about feeling superior to those who don't share your views.

I don't believe in that kind of American John Wayne individualism where people pull themselves up by their bootstraps. Someone changed your diapers. And if that's the case, you ain't self-made.

There is only one way to go: up. I like to find cheap assets with problems. It gives me power.

Try to sell cold callers something and be very insistent. Works well. Also good for door-to-door sales people, especially if they're wearing poor shoes.