Bill Door was impressed. Miss Flitworth could actually give the word "revenue", which had two vowels and one diphthong, all the peremptoriness of the word "scum.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I guess if I had to pick a spiritual figurehead to possess the deed to the entirety of Earth, I'd go with Buddha, but only because he wouldn't want it.

Dare to imagine. Dare to be. Books are the seeds. Dreams are the soil. The fruit of the harvest, a world reborn.

While it takes at least two to reconcile, it only takes one to forgive.

The only thing worse than bad health is a bad name.

I'll transform anything as long as it's edible.

In the beginning, the head of the Gods called a council of the Gods; and they came together and concocted a plan to create the world and people it.

Everything must change, everything must move forward.

As a kid I was goofy and creative and sensitive. I like to think I'm all of those now too - just with wrinkles.

Whenever God wakes in us, our thinking becomes clear - nothing is missing.

Iniesta - he is the Zinedine Zidane of the team, because he can do whatever you want him to with the ball.