Billy squinted at me. "Why are you letting them go?""Because they're real.""How do you know?""The one I was holding crapped on my hand.

I died. I died and someone made a clerical error and I am in Heaven.

In the name of the Pizza Lord. Charge!

It rained toads the day the White Council came to town.

Monsters are born of pain, and grief, and loss, and anger. Your heart is full of them.--"And?"And it makes you vulnerable.

Success is not for everyone, but if everyone had a phobia of failure, success was going to be a common thing.

Everyone knew that bugs traveled in packs. Only the stupid ones got caught. The smart ones lay in wait for her to go to sleep so they could attack.

Self-pity is egotism undiluted, after all—self-centeredness in its purest form.

My mom would have killed me before, but I'm an adult woman now, and I'm ready to show the world that you can have it all at 40 - be fabulous, 40, and pose for Playboy.

The basic condition of human life is happiness.

There's something nice and safe about having money.

I'm looking to be the next comedy mogul.

The soul's bliss and suffering are bound together.

Successful strategies adhere to a basic pattern.

I enjoy going back and forth between plays and novels. It's like having a wife and a mistress. Books are the wife; plays, the mistress.