Black beauty - he's a dark horse.

Velcro: what a rip-off.

I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one.

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox.

Ive decided to sell my Hoover… well, it was just collecting dust.

I went out on a date with Simile. I don't know what I metaphor.

I was reading a book... 'the history of glue' - I couldn't put it down.

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.

So I said to the gym instructor: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: I can't make Tuesdays.'

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red.

I took part in the sun-tanning Olympics – I just got bronze.

A halo surrounded the grim reaper nun, Sister Maria. (By the way-I like this human idea of the grim reaper. I like the scythe. It amuses me.)

With the explosion of the internet has come numerous avenues for small business owners to share their expertise and position themselves as experts. And expertise is what consumers are looking for.

It was, of course, another test. Everything in human life was a test. That was why they all looked so stressed out.

If Nature built by rule and square, Than man what wiser would she be? What wins us is her careless care, And sweet unpunctuality.

I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.

India is a reservoir of alternative interpretations of what the global is, and these ways of viewing the world need to be exposed.

When plunder becomes a way of life, men create for themselves a legal system that authorizes it and a moral code that glorifies it.

Even if I were certain that the world would end tomorrow, I would plant a tree this very day

He did it alone. We had a cast of a million.

New York has their own character. I love the fans here. They are very honest, and I love that.