Born again?! No, I'm not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse.

We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.

You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven.

Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.

Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.

There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.

It's foolish to be prejudiced. There are so many reasons to hate people on an individual basis.

Arise, awake, stop not till the goal is reached.

Find strength in your heartbeat, than weakness with a beat heart. Take each breath as another chance, and love for a new day.

The Bible differentiates clearly between true faith and mere religiosity.

All war presupposes human weakness and seeks to exploit it.

I'm not sure I would have ever decided to try to write when I was forty-five if I hadn't already gotten that degree [in English].

And the days are not full enough And the nights are not full enough And life slips by like a field mouse Not shaking the grass

Dance as though no one is watching. Love as though you've never been hurt. Sing as though no one can hear you. Live as though heaven is on earth.

Seek to give much -- expect nothing.

Only a fool does not fear actors, but you can't beat them, and if you can't beat them, join them, as they say. As I've got older I've become very interested in that part of the work

The man who thinks only of his own generation is born for few.