But Charlie could imagine, because he was a Beta Male, and imagination was his curse....

Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.

Mr. Asher, you can resist who you are for only so long. Finally, you just decide to go with fate.

So I am death" Charlie said then turned to his daughter while buttering his toast."This is death toast sweety.

Blessed with the Beta Male imagination, he spent much of his life squinting into the future so he might spot ways in which the world was conspiring to kill him...

when you live forever and don't age, it gives you time to hope

I pour blood on my naiveté, your apathy, and your betrayal tonight.

Anyone who experienced World War I close-hand was grossed out by it forever. It just was so awful.

I wish I had a typical workday. I struggle to get up at seven and almost always fail. I just try to get to my office as soon as I can, but it's always later than I would like.

You really think that on my films people tell me what to do? I don't think so. On my films I decide.

I don't watch anything I'm in. Not even on set. I won't go over to the monitor to watch what we've just shot. It's too terrible. I think I'm just very self-conscious.

'God' - as revealed in his book of edicts and narratives is practically an idiot. He has nothing to say that any sensible person should want to listen to.

I was like, what the hell is my life coming to? I'm a trained actor! I've done Shakespeare and here I am having farting contests with an imaginary dog!

I dream of a church that is a mother and shepherdess.

Duty is God;Work is worship.