But I had not the strength nor the inclination to bandy words with a drunkard. What have you done when you have bested a fool?

Listen, here's what I'd like to do: I'd like to live in a trailer and play records all night.

You must pay for everything in this world one way and another. There is nothing free except the Grace of God. You cannot earn that or deserve it.

Time just gets away from us.

My Master of Arts degree means nothing at all to these monkeys and I have come to share their indifference.

I know what they said even if they would not say it to my face. People love to talk. They love to slander you if you have any substance.

The wicked flee when none pursueth.

As he drank, little brown drops of coffee clung to his mustache like dew. Men will live like billy goats if they are let alone.

Lookin' back is a bad habit.

Nothing I like to do pays well.

If you want anything done right you will have to see to it yourself every time.

It is adversity that often creates beauty.

Faith does not offer a strong link between our beliefs and actual states of the world.

Lovely flowers sometimes bloom in ugly places.

A very small cause which escapes our notice determines a considerable effect that we cannot fail to see, and then we say that the effect is due to chance.

There is more to biology than rats, Drosophila, Caenorhabditis, and E. coli.

All I do know, for certain, after 53 years in this business, is that writers who sincerely think that their language can represent reality ought to be plumbers.

There is not a good work which the hand of man has ever undertaken, which his heart has ever conceived, which does not require a good education for its helper.

I'm a comic because I don't want to do the nine-to-five, I have to modify that and say I'm a comic because I have an inability to do a nine-to-five.

I know Wikipedia is very cool. A lot of people do not think so, but of course they are wrong.