But nowhere in the file had anyone said, “Oh, and by the way, he runs like a gazelle with an espresso addiction.” At least not in the parts I’d skimmed.

Don’t you think it’s a bad sign that your best argument for your beau is that nothing has been proved in court?

The journey is the destination.

Humor is probably the most significant characteristics of the human mind. Far more significant than reason. In fact, reason is actually a very cheap commodity.

Having a kid made me realize, "I have to take care of this kid, but I can't have the luxury of dropping everything in the world and spending every waking moment with him. I've got to work."

Who you are as a character is kind of the foundation of everything.

The one-child policy was based on some faulty science and had, as an ambition, reining in Chinese population growth, so as to enhance the per capita wealth of the country.

The awesome thing about failure is that it is only temporary. Embrace it, learn the lesson and come back blazing.

I've always despised the hippies.

I think a lot of studios today are run by women, and we are entering a time when a lot of women have evolved in Second City and Upright Citizens Brigade and wanted to become writers and comedians.

Ideas and products and messages and behaviors spread just like viruses do.

They build machines they can't control, and bury the waste in a great big hole.