Captain Hook's mother, who said to Little Hook, For God sakes, don't scratch it! Never got a dinner!

There is only one goal. That's to keep working and keep flossing.

When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary.

Moses, who said to the children of Israel, Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before. Never got a dinner!

Donald Trump's mother, who said, Donnie! Stop playing Monopoly and get in that barber's chair! Never got a dinner!

Amelia Earhart, who said, Stop looking for me; see if you can find my luggage! Never got a dinner!

Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner!

George W. Bush, who said to Pope John Paul II, Give us a visit, and bring the missus. Never got a dinner!

King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner!

Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?"

Jack the Ripper's mother, who said to Jack, How come I never see you with the same girl twice? Never got a dinner!

He was both her hero and enemy. She was his best student and biggest regret.

I'm a one-drink woman two at the most three I'm under the table four I'm under the host.

How much shall I be changed before I am changed!

The greatest sign of success for a teacher... is to be able to say, 'The children are now working as if I did not exist.'

I've worked with actors who treat the first two takes like rehearsals. And that's okay. If the camera is on you and we're doing a scene where I'm off camera, I'm treating that as a rehearsal.

To make what fate intends for me my own intention

The man who has done less than his best has done nothing.

Electric light is just another instrument. I have no desire to contrive fantasies mediumistically or sociologically over it or beyond it.

I know, but I do not approve. And I am not resigned.

I think anybody starting any new career needs work.