Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white.

When a person is devastated, it coneys that the individual is regretting for his or her mistakes.

Perhaps the only happily ever after is to survive to tell the story

Anyone who can appease a man's conscience can take his freedom away from him.

The one cool thing with getting older is that you can actively choose to just be an eccentric.

We had been so close to missing each other, he and I. He had turned out to be the greatest gift of all.

When you see reference to a new paradigm you should always, under all circumstances, take cover.

The friendly preacher who fails to warn of the reality of Hell, betrays the Son of God with a kiss.

You must have absolute faith in your own perceptions of truth. Never act in haste or hurry; be deliberated in everything; wait until you know the true way.

The mind is smaller than the eye.

Ok so there's no TV shows, no movies going on fine, but I love going on stage and performing stand up so my situation is a little better than someone who's strictly just an actor or actress.